d8 Varieties of Intelligent Monkey

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If you see a connection between this and my last post, you are on the right track.


1. Guerilla Monkey: small and nimble, with excellent grip strength. Protect monkey society by surprise violence. The signature move is to drop out of trees with rope and garrote the intruders.

2. Gorilla Guard: Big and burly, protect the valuables of simian society. The monkey god is in this form, and thus the gorilla is the holiest of monkeys. Indeed, violence is the rule of the jungle. Who would challenge the mightiest of apes?

3. Tamarin Ascetics. Only those small, frail monkeys which have never touched a banana in their life may be inducted into this order. The virtues extolled by the ascetics include sagacity, cognitive flexibility, and playfulness. The order of Tamarin Ascetics is looked down upon by the majority of simian society, having rejected the stoic and unyielding way of violence.

4. Chimpanzee Inventor: Known for creating tools ranging in utility and efficiency from dead branch inspectors (basically a mallet) to Rube Goldberg-esque banana delivery systems, the chimp is perhaps the type of primate that will bring the promised Long Leap Forward into primate prosperity. These projects are often highly collaborative and the design process chaotic, with many inventions never reaching fruition. 

5. Howler Sentries: If you hear a deep and echoing hooting through the jungle, know that you will soon be set upon by a simian squad. Howlers set up high in trees, scanning the underbrush for jungle intruders. When one is spotted, they begin to howl. They launch a rock trailed by colorful feathers into the air, marking the location. Then the militia moves in to take care of those who would trespass. Often assisted by Aye-Aye lookouts, who have excellent vision even in the dark.

6. The Fashion Icons: Grooming only became a bigger deal for monkeys as they gained intelligence. Now there is a small economy of groomers, headdress designers, and accessory procurers for the high society. Keep an eye out for the new arrivals this fall on the catwalk!

7. Baboon Berserker: Baboons are extremely aggressive and should be treated with extreme caution. They are outcasts of organized monkeys due to their destructive and voracious habits. They scavenge the earth in the most remote regions of the jungle, tearing up the land and consuming and ravaging whatever they can. They are an active threat to anything not as strong as them.

8. Orangutan Gardeners: The most serene of the primates, orangutans spend their time meticulously cultivating beautiful gardens. They grow gorgeous fruits, flowers, and even nurture the rarest of plants. The gardens are highly revered and respected. When living in an environment that changes and grows and unpredictable ways, maintaining a long-term botanical effort is precious.

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